Saturday 23 February 2008
23:13 | Posted by
Dale Darley |
Across the room in yet another non descript dive she met his eyes, they laugh and talk. When she wakes in the morning he is cradling her face and saying all the things that she longed to hear.
Time passes, parties galore, with nothing much in common they marry. He is supportive of her need to become better educated, whilst constantly reminding her how clever he is. She doesn't notice her confidence slipping away as the comments slip darkly from his lips. They are mingled with compliments which confuse her. This is her life. She often looks in the mirror and wonders who she sees. The little girl with so much hope or the stupid stupid wife.
Time passes love fades. She looks at the monster man, bewildered. So charming to others, the gentleman is never exposed. 10 years on, the golden key of education is passed to her. Holding it tightly she pulls on her parachute pack, heavy on her back, and jumps. Drifting surprising slowly to the ground, she is free.
Turning back to stare over the landscape of lost love, she wonders how she never noticed her identity slide away. Turning the other way she sees her angel, smiling she hands over her award, framed and ready for all to see, clever, clever girl.
6 months later, spsruced up and ready to rock, she steps confidently once again into the snake pit, bitten and smitten so easily.
Like hideous purple flocked wallpaper the pattern repeats until she no longer knows who she is or where she is going.
Stupid stupid stupid.
The cruel mouth rarely stops. By day she is a sucessful career woman, running teams and beating deadlines, at night she dares not ask a question for fear of reprisal. Sitting on the sofa staring into space. Counting the passing traffic she passes her time.
After 15 years together, he buys her a computer. He said, that with this gift she could become more useful. She smiled.
At night her fingers type, she occasionally looks up as another can of beer is opened or abuse hurled at the TV that refuses to deliver just one decent programme. Her online friends become her world.
With access to other places she builds a digital pathway to nirvana. One day she comes home, executes her plan and is gone.
He notices her missing when he suddenly realises the tapping of the keys no longer annoys him. He shrugs.
Lying in her new bed, in a another town, anticipating her new job she closes her eyes. Behind her eylids lie the remains of two battles hard fought. Trails of verbal abuse crushed into the carpet of her mind. As she steps over her bloody past towards a pale blue horizon, the mantal of victim falls off her shoulders. She sleeps.
The sun rises its a beautiful new day. She is one of the lucky ones.
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